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October 12, 2008 Est 1999 Scotland's award-winning independent newspaper
The depths of Marine life

IS IT just me, or do I detect more sniggering, restless foot-shuffling and unscripted voiceovers from the audience than is usual when the recruitment advert for the Royal Marine Commandos is screened at the cinema? Located on some South Pacific or Asian shore, the first character in the frame is our villain, a psychopathic-looking native with an oil-slicked and pigment-daubed body who is screaming in an incomprehensible, warlike tongue. Out from below a tropical bush creep our heroes, the Marines, the professionals employed by HM government to protect us all from miscellaneous nutters in foreign parts.

This advert is in a different league of ambition entirely from the plodding "Army - Be The Best" adverts that showed teenagers enduring borderline sado-masochistic survival exercises. At least they had an air of reality about them. This Marines advert is positively cinematic by comparison, if unreconstructed - a sort of Rambo versus idol-worshipping cannibals from Hollywood central casting circa the 1930s, directed by Ronald Reagan, and co-funded by Fox News. Unapologetic propaganda for the UK military project, it should come with a statutory warning, something like: "Joining the Royal Marine Commandos, or any other branch of HM Forces, could cause you to be killed, maimed or enlisted in some morally bankrupt war that you do not understand or don't agree with."

Still, the advert will doubtless appeal to the sort of young man who goes in for the Zoo magazine Man Of The Year competition currently advertised on the Royal Marines website under the banner "Are You Man Enough?". Win this competition and you net £3000, an iPhone, laptop, plasma screen TV, limited-edition Adidas trainers, digital camera and more. You also get to enjoy "not only the bragging rights of being the hardest man in Britain, but a once-in-a-lifetime experience of flying in a jet!". Zoo magazine apparently needed a "measurement of macho". Logically, it chose the Marines.

I'm not surprised that teachers have issues with this blatantly one-sided, rather reckless propaganda. After all, they spend their working lives trying to calm down aggressive young men who want to run around attacking people. This week, the National Union of Teachers voted to "support teachers and schools in opposing Ministry of Defence recruitment activities in schools that are based upon misleading propaganda".

The union also noted that the armed services concentrate their "awareness-raising" efforts in schools in deprived areas - in Wales, the army's own figures reveal 50% of its careers sessions had been thus targeted. Kids with few prospects have always been the prime recruiting base for the military.

The NUT can expect a neutron bomb-load of shit to be dropped on its heads for its efforts. The "Support Our Valiant Lads" army will be out in force, all the old, posh generals and toadying, lickspittle defence spokesmen who get wheeled out to talk about the courage of our armed forces, the debt of honour we owe them and the grievous body blow that will be dealt to recruitment as a consequence of this decision.

You have to admire bravery in the service of others, naturally. But there are other ways to demonstrate that bravery, such as joining the police, the fire service or mountain rescue squads.

And why does being in the armed services automatically make you a hero? Most recruits enlist for familiar, pragmatic reasons. Those born into the brigadier classes are more or less guaranteed a swift promotion to some cushy, elevated rank. Candidates who lack the qualifications for other jobs, who crave risk-taking and adventure, and yearn for the laddishness of the mess, are captivated by the armed forces. The army promises them "a lifetime of reward", full of "excitement, travel, opportunity". It's the only way some people are ever going to see a competitive pay and benefits or get a training, let alone qualify for subsidised accommodation and food, free medical and dental care, discounted rail travel and subsidised childcare. If I was facing a life stacking shelves in Tesco, I guess I'd be chuffed that the armed services wanted to send me off on a free helicopter ride.

But where's the balance? Maybe I missed it, but clicking on the armed forces recruitment websites, there's nothing to suggest that a career in this area has any downside, such as being blown up in Basra, or getting stuck on some God-forsaken base in Helmand province, Afghanistan, risking life and limb in an unwinnable war. This is the courageous point the teachers are making.

Why is this courageous? Because the armed services have always been a sacred cow, beyond criticism. Civil society is expected to silence political or moral objections when confronted with service personnel in uniforms. This is jingoistic nonsense.

We can't blame young people for being sucked into the services, but when they are sent to fight in useless wars, we should keep saying so. Above all, we should never stop challenging the politicians who sent them there in the first place.

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Posted by: Mercutio, Falkirk on 6:42am Sun 30 Mar 08
Ms Blythman your article positively reeks with the self regarding superiority of the guardianista type chatterring class.
Stick to writing about fish swimming in their own faeces if you wish to comment on marine life.
Posted by: Donald Anderson, glasgow on 7:11am Sun 30 Mar 08
Good on ye Joanna.

As John MacLean once said, "The only army worth joining is the socialist army. Goddam all other armies"

As a retired teacher I have been hauled up for objecting to Army Recruitment in schools blighted by unemployment.

Stick the Labour MPs in their Queen's Army and stop invading other countries. Get rid of the real neds.

Let them eat mince.
Posted by: Hugh Kerr, Edinburgh on 8:05am Sun 30 Mar 08
Great stuff Joanna
Posted by: Jock Bell, Basra on 9:08am Sun 30 Mar 08
As an ex Royal Marine you are going to tint my comments with bias, whichever way you twist it lest we remember that EVERYONE who joins the armed forces in the UK is doing so on a voluntary basis, and these days everyone knows and fully understands the dangers involved (Certainly in the RM this is highlighted from the initial careers office brief onwards!) Why is it that everyone who complains and drips about this, are the people who have never made the kind of sacrifice involved in so called "pointless wars". Every statement released from a killed serviceman or womans family will tell you "They died doing a job they loved, for a cause they believed in!" I would agree with that and would never wish to trivialise anybody's sacrifice form the safety of home. You are all entitled to an opinion as this is a "free" country, however let's not lose sight of why it's free in the first place eh?
Posted by: heady on 10:14am Sun 30 Mar 08
The advert is designed to appeal to psychopaths – what’s new?
Posted by: Ron Sutherland, Innerleithen on 10:16am Sun 30 Mar 08
Jo - unfortunate that you should have shot so wildly from your presumably finely contoured little hip, without genuinely knowing and appreciating the key facts in all of this.

Those like myself with personal practical experience of the forces and indeed of special forces know that only very few achieve selection for RM duty (because of their extremely high standards - best in the world), and that the essential elements in all of this are intelligence, self-control & self-discipline.

The violent mostly cowardly hotheads and ignoramuses who seek to join up are soon exposed and dropped. Moreover, you do yourself and many others a huge disservice by demonstrating a serious inability to recognise the magnificent qualities and personal attributes of loyalty, dedication, bravery, courage and conviction which so defines all our wonderful military forces as a cut above anything else.

A great pity you failed to understand or portray any of that in your terribly biased piece.
Posted by: Mercutio, Falkirk on 10:23am Sun 30 Mar 08
From The Sunday Times
March 30, 2008

Lance Corporal Matt Croucher hurls himself onto Taliban grenade
One man’s heroism saved the lives of his patrol
Posted by: Mike MacKinnon on 10:52am Sun 30 Mar 08
Errmm, why does every army call themselves 'the best in the world?' The 'best' at what?
Posted by: willie on 10:57am Sun 30 Mar 08
So the war in Iraq is about the safety of home,according to poster Jock at 9.08 today)

Don't agree with that one Jock. Nor do I with the comment that all who die do so for a cause they belived in.

Sadly, our military have been deployed on an illegal war that has achieved no strategic objectives.

On the world stage the incursion into Iraq has been a disaster, five years on from the initial military intervention the country is in chaos, the UK military have had to beat the retreat from an unwinnable situation, and Iraq's neighbour Iran is now emboldened in it's geopolitical aspirations.

Yes the UK military have been pulled into an ill conceived illegal war that has no public support whatsoever, and it is a tragedy that so many of our brave miltary have been called to participate in this absolute mess.

Lions directed by donkeys.

Dulce et decorum est.Pro patria mori
Posted by: McSomeone, Scotland on 12:02pm Sun 30 Mar 08
War is a Racket!

General Smedley-Butler USMC 1881 -1940
Posted by: Anne Morrison, Eastleigh on 12:59pm Sun 30 Mar 08
There are so many points in this article I'd like to comment on!!!! But won't have space! 1) How you can call this "The Depths of Marine Life" from watching an ad in a cinema...beats me! 2)Yes, in my book anyone, anyone who works for others and gets paid far less than those school teachers who are objecting to recruitment campaigns ( the school teachers don't seem to be able to stop the teenagers killing each other!) Are heroes! All armed forces and uniformed services that are there for the public good and protection ARE heroes. We all do the job we want to do. Yours Joanna, appears to be about making sweeping statements about something of which you have no knowledge! 3) ANYONE who doesn't think you will have to go in to battle or kill someone if you join any of the forces..clearly wasn't taught very well by those high paid teachers. I am employed by the government toprovide a public service, just like all the other services, we have to do what the politicians say...and YOU are the people who voted them in..not me! And just to be totally controversial..... I think 2 years conscription should be brought back ( oh and yes, I have a son who would love to join up but will never be able to but I'd have been proud of him if he had) But there again maybe he'll become a teacher and be able to teach youngsters that yes, people do get killed in wars!
Posted by: Anne Morrison, Eastleigh on 1:10pm Sun 30 Mar 08
Addendum : I know quite a few armed services personnel, from all the services, but including the Royal Marines and from my experience they are the most self-effacing men I have ever met! Not your macho yobs as Jo would appear to presume!
Posted by: Benjamin on 1:17pm Sun 30 Mar 08
Well i did not join the Australian Defence Force cause of an advertisment or a exciting add on T.V i joined because i want to serve my country and yes i could do it in the police force or fire fighting service but i think the Army at the moment needs me more and allso i can enlist at 17 i cant join either the police force nor the fire fighting departments aswell as it being a life long dream to serve just cause i joined the army doesnt automaticaly make me a hero so how about go do some real artical writing or just support the troops considering they dont say they want to go iraq or afghanistan or numerouse other places its a few men in an office who wont be putting there life on the line so either support or serve

Benjamin F
Posted by: Anne Morrison, Vileda34@hotmail.com on 1:34pm Sun 30 Mar 08
Benjamin.... in my definition of a hero these days..... you do not have to die, or kill someone.......... you ARE a hero for wanting to serve and /or protect others...because you want to!
Posted by: Dan Humphries, West Sussex on 2:59pm Sun 30 Mar 08
As I'm joining the Royal Marines and nearly have got to the recruit Training stage, I'll comment on how the AFCO (Armed force carrers office) have done there best!

Yes I agree somewhat to the point the advert glorifies the military, but at every stage of my application I have known I could be going to war, the chief in the AFCO even turned round to me and said I will be going to war if I pass training, he also asked if I wished to back out. My answer was no, and to be honest I'm fed up with all this bullshit people keep posting about the military!

I hope one day your in a life or death situation where you need someone to rescue you, and it's the military who turns up, I'd like to see you reject there help then, but you wouldn't because your a coward that likes to hide behind pen and paper.
Posted by: Stevie, Glasgow on 3:00pm Sun 30 Mar 08
Will this be? "The Best in the World" brigade who invaded Spain Twice !!.When they should have been storming Gibralter.
I happened to be out on an expedition that included two retired Royal Marines when this story broke.
Both said they were dissapointed to see this happen,but were not surprised.
As for a free country,a lot more than the military are responsible for that.
Besides if you really want to be the best join the REP.
Posted by: Gurugordon, US on 3:40pm Sun 30 Mar 08
Rather than attack the lions, why not attack the donkeys, who so misuse and abuse their courage and patriotism by sending them to fight in wars where their presence should never be requested.
Posted by: JamesM on 5:14pm Sun 30 Mar 08
I have never been a militarist in political terms and I have no working experience of the armed forces. But I can't help but be nauseated by Joanna Blythman's attack on people who are far braver and do a far harder job than herself. Food critic, you say? Perhaps as she chokes to death on an organic sausage she'll realise what putting her neck on the line is all about.
Posted by: McSomeone, Scotland on 6:18pm Sun 30 Mar 08
I've no problem with young men or women joining the armed forces but they should know exactly what they will be getting themselves into and why and what could happen to them. If knowing the consequences of joining the armed forces they still wish too, then fair enough they have made an informed decision.
Posted by: robbo, cumbria on 10:03am Mon 31 Mar 08
AS an ex marine i find your comments disconcerting. Who do you think makes it possible for you to speak freely all the Liberals out there who would have us disband most of our armed forces i think not. It is easy for those who have never had to leave the safty of there home to sit there and pass judgement but just think of the people out there and give them the support they need.
IT IS NOT THE CRITTIC THAT COUNTS, NOT THE ONE WHO POINTS OUT HOW THE STRONG MAN STUMBLED OR HOW THE DOER OF GOOD DEEDS MIGHT HAVE DONE THEM BETTER.
THE CREDIT BELONGS TO THE MAN WHO IS ACTUALLY IN THE ARENA. WHO'S FACE IS MARRED WITH SWEAT, DUST AND BLOOD, WHO STRIVES VALIANTLY, WHO ERRS AND COMES SHORT AGAIN AND AGAIN.
WHO KNOWS THE GREAT ENTHUSIASMS, THE GREAT DEVOTIONS, AND SPENDS HIMSELF IN A WORTHY CAUSE.
WHO IF HE WINS KNOWS THE TRIUMPH OF HIGH ACHIEVMENT, AND IF HE FAILS AT LEAST FAILS WHILE DARING GREATLY, SO THAT HIS PLACE SHALL NEVER BE WITH THOSE COLD AND TIMID SOULS, WHO KNOW NITHER VICTORY NOR DEFEAT
Posted by: matty kershaw, Merseyside on 7:23pm Mon 31 Mar 08
get a life woman, lads sighning up these days all know the realities of war, and are pointed out through the recruitment process. Uks armed forces are all professional soldiers, not aggressive men, regardless of what life they had before joining. Keep your pointless comments to yourself.
Posted by: Peter Bell, Australia293-743 on 4:03am Tue 1 Apr 08
I know nothing of this lady, but her ilk is typical of lefties throughout the western world, especially teacher unions, who loud in critical comment but short on any type of positive thought!
One would have thought that those in the British Isles would be proud of the Royal Marines, and other UK armed forces; the critics such as she would be the first to call on them at the first sign of peril.
Peter Bell
Posted by: Paul Lynch, East Sussex on 3:55pm Wed 21 May 08
Idiocy!!! Lets just say that if we did pack it all in, I believe we would be having serious terrorist activities eventually across the majority of Europe and have more incidents in London (Our Heart). We can all continue to point the finger, but its the people that have the bravery to get the job done... That is 'doing bad things to bad people'. I am currently training to join the Royal Marines. I look forward to being part of a WORTHY CAUSE, and having the courage to take the fight to their doorstep and not ours!
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