THERE IS an extraordinary book you should look for. The author's name is Adam Hochschild. The title appeared first in 2005, and ought to be in paperback by now. It is called Bury the Chains, and it is, stupendously, a history of the 19th century trade in terrified human flesh, otherwise known as slavery.

Struggle as I might, I cannot find an entry in Mr Hochschild's book for Ronaldo, Cristiano. Mentions of the verbal construction "to Blatter" are likewise absent. Lampard, Frank is also missing, along with "£140,000 every single damned week". Funny, that.

So I'm at home, watching, as one does, BBC4. They are running an over-long film about Tommie Smith, his comrade John Carlos, and the 1968 Mexico Games. Suddenly, it all comes flooding back.

I was a child in those days. Twelve, if you really need to check. But when Smith raised that black glove while David Coleman whined, we parochial playground neds were electrified. Out of our mucky shoes. We were not black (sadly), but suddenly - and I know how daft this seems - we were. In an Edinburgh housing scheme Smith and his comrades were persecuted relentlessly thereafter by Avery Brundage and the rest of the country club Nazi crew. No-one cares these days about rich sports types if they refuse the option of a brain.

Yet, when one Herr Blatter decides to intervene in a multi-million-pound player contract, certain questions arise.

Manchester United have not asked one, as yet. Lawyers, I suspect, are being consulted. Herr Blatter's friendship with Don Calderon, of Real Madrid, has been mentioned, for journalistic illustration. But still (lawyers on stand-by), try this: the titular head of Fifa has been corrupted by Spanish power. What follows?

He thinks - I can provide quotes - that the English clubs are too rich, too mighty, and too smug to be tolerated. They also win too many football matches.

Taking Manchester United down a peg would bring his very peculiar world back into balance. Chelsea make things complicated, but their Russian ownership helps in Blatter's Euro-world. Arsene Wenger and Rafael Benitez supply a universe he can grasp.

Then, though, there's Fergie. You don't have to like the old geezer, necessarily. You may suspect, like Herr Blatter, that a certain coach of a certain persuasion has entrapped a talented young player from Portugal in a contract that stuffs his mouth with gold, but amounts, nevertheless, to "slavery".

Herr Blatter contends that Cristiano Ronaldo is "a slave". The implication, therefore, is that all European footballers, all earning improbable sums, are also enslaved. Is this true? Is this, equally, an appropriate use of the word slavery in the English language? I would beg leave to doubt it.

OK, as long-dead pop stars would once have put it, let's go. Ramones, forgive me.

Herr Blatter has intervened in a transfer. This is not, in any sense, on, or even legal. He has also elected to pronounce on commerce and trade between nations. In this regard, certain laws apply. One: you can't. Football is not a protected species, these days, under any legal code. The sport abides (mostly) according to the same business rules as anyone.

So, here's a notion. Let's get Blatter arrested. Not a joke. Who is this person, after all? Last week he felt sufficiently powerful to make mischief with a very expensive transfer deal. Perhaps he has an opinion concerning the future of Frank Lampard. Fascinating.

Doesn't quite answer the question, though, does it? Other questions. Who the f*ck is Sepp Blatter, what does he really do, and why does he do it? Am I allowed to threaten the life of Herr Blatter? Best check.

So, sitting at home on a wet afternoon, I have two provisional answers. First, I don't care. Secondly, I really don't care.

Cast your mind back to comrade Tommie Smith. Think about that black glove, and what might once have mattered to schemie kids who cared, once, about a game. Think then of all those arguments over sport and money.

Now here's Cristiano. They are starving that talented youth to death, apparently. They have abused his deep and sincere faith. Or not. Posssibly, they are preening him for still more glory (and money). Tough call.

The problem, as usual, is Blatter. I more or less grasp the Fifa electoral processs. All of a sudden, though, the grizzled ancient appears to also have grasped the right to go on forever, while inserting himself into an enormous deal for a Manchester United midfield player.

Isn't that less than legal? Shouldn't Herr Blatter restrain himself, somewhat? Or are there not laws? Or perhaps we could just all go back to watching football?

I tried that, just the other day. Kids in a park. Sunshine and natural skill: it doesn't get much better. Then the little lads kicked the bits out from one another: that was good, too.

None of this will get us back to Herr Blatter, clearly. It will not be communicated, I think, to the various agents of the various talents in the football transfer market cesspool. Ronaldo is a talent, I think. Blatter is not a fool, so far as I know. Figure. But both have used the word slave in recent interviews.

Frank Lampard is a good east end boy. Ronaldo is not. Does no-one remember what a lawyer is for?